UnrulyMom.Com

Latest Entries »

Things you might have missed today

Filed under: Being Mom, Politics — Leave a comment

July 1, 2013

So what you might have missed today was that Rick Perry reserved all of the rooms in the Capitol extension, so we were unable to have food delivered to us, and we couldn’t view the streams like we were able to do previously. Police were staged in the auditorium. This reservation extends, conveniently enough, for the next 30 days.

They brought mounted police in all the way from Houston to give more of an appearance that the peaceful protesters were an Unruly Mob of Rioters.

The State Preservation Board (which is essentially Perry and his cronies) made up rules about where we were able to stand and/or sit that DPS troopers attempted to enforce several times before they finally made us move. I don’t even think DPS could deal with the cognitive dissonance of telling someone they were safer sitting in the middle of a room than they were with their backs against the wall, so we did manage to stall them until they decided to call upon the power of “we have guns and handcuffs and we say so. So you must do so.”

A whole lot of women made a WHOLE LOT of noise. People who came to our assembly at 7 PM tonight told us they could hear us from outside, and those in the gallery could hear us from there. It was a beautiful, wonderful, glorious din.

I observed that pro-life people seem to be in a constant state of funeral dirge, and I wondered if their children (some of whom were praying on their knees on that hard marble floor, and I felt really bad for them) felt wistful about the celebratory atmosphere surrounding those of us who were singing and chanting and fighting for our rights

The people’s filibuster, which was an amazing idea, got drowned out by the energetic noise in the rotunda. Some amazing stories were shared by Quinn. Other stories were submitted by email and via livestream. I really would like to continue to do this action for the duration of the session, if we can get more women to tell their stories on camera. They inspired me.

I got to hold an adorable baby.

We had an incredible march with over 1500 people.

The dems backstabbed the radicals and activists by continuing to make threats and attempting to block them from participating in the rallies outside.

I am one wore-out motherfucker. Tomorrow is a work day, but there is a hearing that starts at 3:30, and I’m probably going to head over after work.

I discovered I’m not a huge fan of livestreaming because I can’t keep up with twitter or facebook while livestreaming, and I prefer to just take pictures, but I have concerns that our main livestreamers are dudes…as is our main Twitterer. How can they step back if no one is stepping up? Still working through that one…

Regardless, There’s really nothing like being packed into a crowded room with a few hundred people you know and love dearly. There’s some amazing video on my ustream account: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/lainieduro

Mostly, it was a long, loud, beautiful, exhausting day. Tomorrow, it’s requested that people get to The Capitol early in the morning (7 AM if possible) so they can be ready to sign up to speak at the hearing. I hope a lot of people show up.

OH, and…the people united will never be defeated.

Tags: #feministarmy, #hb2, #sb9, #txlege, abortion, activism, choice, protest, texas

Comment

I was a television version of a person with a broken heart

Filed under: Love, Nerdgasm, Politics — Leave a comment

June 21, 2013

(alternate title: How not to talk to your children about the impending apocalypse)

I’ve been breaking good habits. But I guess that’s allowable on occasion. Important work is always getting done. Even when the important work is completely “unproductive.”

Mostly, though, this week has awakened a whole lot of interesting events around the world. And a whole lot of overcoming, although that never seems like enough…

And in this time of visible and tangible overcoming of it.

a protester reclining in front of riot police in Turkey

Arduous, painful, but joyful overcoming of it.

And, you know…You just gotta stay inspired…and appreciate the overcoming of it.

Revolutions In The Park – thanks to Austin Audio Co-Op ❤

Tags: bradley manning, cat, edward snowden, helen keller, Istanbul, turkey, whistleblowers

Comment

…and the sun it shined a little stronger.

Filed under: Art & Literature, Being Mom, Food!, Love, Musicness, Nerdgasm, Politics — Leave a comment

June 11, 2013

The Tao of C & mama

Over the weekend, I hosted another fine installment in a neverending series of teenage slumber parties.

Can you see the tiniest evidence of the scrap of influence I attempt to exert over these situations?

Oh, slumber parties. I don’t think TTOC slept at all, but his friend admitted he fell asleep at some point during the night. But they had fun, and they’re such good boys.

And tonight, Buddha the Grouch made a really tasty dinner that seemed to have been cursed for at least the last week. First, the rice he had been carefully saving for stir fry – allowing it to become the perfect texture – got eaten. Then he got sick. Then today, when he finally got down to cooking this epic meal, he opened the tofu to discover it smelled like, as he described it, cat butt. And it really did. I’m not sure how that happened with unopened tofu that was not yet past its expiration date, but man…that was the stankiest tofu I ever smelled. Tofu emergency!

We all survived, though I was worried when Monk told me he actually tasted the cat-butt tofu. He had cooked it first, so…I’m still hoping he doesn’t get sick. Yuck. I’ve never smelled tofu like that. So. Gross.

So, the way my work week works, I have two more days of work, then a day off, then one day of work, then two days off. It’s not bad. Not bad at all. Although my next day off is going to be spent running weird errands. I’m still trying to find a good rhythm. This week isn’t a good example because I’m a little rundown & feeling like taking it easy. I have things in the works for the next couple of weeks, though.Exciting times.

By the way…wtf, USA? What. The. Fickety. Fuck?

Tags: food, shadows, snowden, surveillance, tof, usa

Comment

Tread Water

Filed under: Art & Literature, Being Mom, Love, Musicness, Nerdgasm — Leave a comment

June 10, 2013

Today is an anniversary, of sorts. And because I’m a creature of ritual, I have made a ritual of acknowledging this particular passage of time. A day that I met someone who ended up being pretty damn special to me – but more…just special in general. In fact, the thought of this person’s particular nature to this day makes me grin. One of those people who make an impact, whose presence is unique. And, unfortunately, whose presence in my life was uniquely brief, as well as uniquely cherished. So I allowed those memories to occupy my mind a bit today, which was painful, but nice. And tomorrow is another day.

Spent much of the rest of the weekend in pursuit of the perfect shelves. I have 2-3 narrow little spaces in my house in which I would like to put shelves. But I’m unwilling to buy anything else new, and so have been perusing Craigslist for the perfect solution. I’m a bit obsessed with finding the perfect shelves for my room. I’m ready to get the stuff I need out of the boxes they are in and into some sort of accessible storage. I’m ALMOST there. My dream room…is ALMOST complete. hahaha.

It’s actually already my dream room. It has a comfy bed and a lock on the door. What more could I ask for?

I’ve been ignoring my garden for the most part. I pulled all of the weeds in my 4×4 beds last weekend. I’m still getting lots of green beans. A few peppers. The cucumbers are on pause.

The best part are the tomato plants by my porch. I have been threatening to transplant them for over a month now. It was my experiment to put them close to my door, so I will be sure to harvest regularly, as I am a LAZY gardener. But there’s a lot of shade where they are currently living, so it didn’t seem like they were ever going to produce fruit. However, since I’ve been too lazy to move them, they’ve been busy sprouting up high enough to grab some sunlight, and we actually have some tomatoes growing now. It’s not like a bumper crop or anything, but if it’ll allow me to be lazy, I’ll settle for a lesser yield. 🙂

I’ve actually been ignoring the news, for the most part, all weekend. Bits and pieces have been penetrating, but I’ve built up a barricade. It’s not easy, nor is it permanent. But I needed a break. Maybe I still need a little bit of a break. In the meantime, I’m figuring out how I can continue to stay connected to groups locally that will enable me to do what I can in the amount of time I have available. I’m sure I’ll be back to reading the news more diligently soon.

For the most part, I’ve spent the weekend watching Let’s Plays of The Sims 3. In other words, I’ve been watching videos of someone else playing The Sims. Hahaha. And to add to the meta-tasticness of it, I’m mostly interested in the videos because the kid who does them reminds me of my kids – who spend much of the weekend playing video games in the next room. About halfway through the weekend, I mostly just continued because the irony of it was cracking me up.

Sometimes, it’s all you can do to just tread water.

❤

Comment

Try Not To Breathe

Filed under: Being Mom, Love — Leave a comment

June 6, 2013

Lately, someone has been attempting to pull me back into a dynamic that I do not wish to be pulled back into. It’s difficult to resist, and there is no reward in resistance or compliance.

…and navigating my emotions is like trying to find splashes of color in weedy undergrowth. It’s there. The color is there. But I can get trapped beneath layer upon layer of prickle, and upon emerging must set about removing the burrs.

This has all happened before. Many times over. Recurring themes are recurring. Difficult people are difficult. And it seems the most difficult people are the most persistent. But I refuse to allow the one major mistake I’ve made in my life to cause me to veer from a path of joy and appreciation for life, and especially not the joy and appreciation for the lives that were the fruit of that one major mistake.

This is all very difficult for me, though. When there is someone in my life insisting emphatically that I am very much the kind of person that I wish not to be. That I am unfair, untrustworthy, mean, a bad parent…regardless of evidence to the contrary, it’s difficult not to listen. Particularly because all I’ve ever wanted in life is to be fair, trustworthy, and nice (which hopefully leads to being a good parent.) Warding off statements to the contrary by my own will is contrary to my nature, as part of being fair, trustworthy, and nice includes listening to others when they tell you your behavior is causing pain or anger.

When confronted with this, I’m forced to remember what makes the person providing this feedback untrustworthy…which is almost more painful than just accepting the criticisms being levied.

I’m also forced to narrow my expectations of appreciation for life. When generally I feel pretty joyful most of the time, and ridiculously simple things inspire long-lasting happiness, in these times I look for small moments. I’m neither an adherent of the principles of AA, nor a religious person, but “one day at a time” can become “one hour at a time” or even “one moment at a time.”

So it is that I am here, carefully picking out stepping stones to support me as I cross this river of familiar frustration and pain. Helicopter arms fully deployed. Trying not to be blinded by the flashes of sunlight reflecting off of the water.

I’ll be alright. I’m already alright. I know I’ll reach the other side eventually. And I’ll try not to think about the next river I will no doubt need to ford once I get there.

❤

Tags: diary, flowers, happiness, personal, prose, sadness

Comment

Slide

Filed under: Art & Literature, Love, Musicness, Nerdgasm, Politics — Leave a comment

June 5, 2013

❤

I just wrote this in my journal:

…I’m blogging about writing in my journal while writing in my journal about blogging…

(and sometimes the oddest mixes happen on shuffle)

Hope, of course, is always accompanied by the fear of hopelessness, which is a legitimate fear.

[…]

The point – the only interesting point – is that we have not quit. Ours is not a fight that you can stay on very long if you look on victory as a sign of triumph or on loss as a sign on defeat. We have not quit because we are not hopeless.

My own aim is not hopelessness. I am not looking for reasons to give up. I am looking for reasons to keep on. -Wendell Berry

and this is just beautiful:

I think I could watch that video all night.

In my journal, I just wrote the words “alpha-indifferent.” Which is not at all descriptive of my feelings about that video. More like this one:

Which brings us full circle. Thematically, if not rhythmically.

❤

Tags: gezipark philharmonic, Kansas City Stomps, low, the decemberists, yo la tengo

Comment

Resistanbul (Not Constantinople)

Filed under: Politics — Leave a comment

June 3, 2013

I took an allergy pill this morning, so I’m fading fast, but wanted to take the time to post these pics of Occupy Austin’s return to City Hall, which was converted to a show of solidarity for the Turkish resistance. Thanks so much to our local members of the Turkish community. My hope is that your friends and family are all safe, but still standing up for their freedom from tyranny and injustice. You are an inspiration.

❤ ❤ ❤

Tags: #ayagakalk, #geziparki, #occupytaksim, chalkupy, occupy austin, occupy gezi, overpass light brigade, resistanbul, texas

Comment

#occupytaksim #ayagakalk #geziparki #occupygezi

Filed under: Politics — Leave a comment

May 31, 2013

First heard the news of this today:

“IT WAS NEVER ONLY ABOUT THE PARK. THE PARK BECAME A SYMBOL FOR EVERYTHING THAT THE GOVERNMENT IS TEARING DOWN, THE TREES THEY CUT DOWN, THE HISTORY THEY DESTROYED, THE RIVERS THEY POLLUTED, THE SEAS THEY FILLED WITH CEMENT, ALL IN THE NAME OF ECONOMICAL GROWTH, AND OF COURSE THE LAWS THEY HAVE ENACTED TO ATTACK OUR PRIVATE LIVES.”

http://www.occupywallstreet.net/story/occupy-taksim-park-grows-after-raid-turkish-police

And things have become progressively worse:

And the kind of hope that only springs from resistance…

http://revoluciontrespuntocero.com/puentesur/increibles-imagenes-de-la-represion-en-turquia/

…and solidarity: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151685267208245

Good summary report here: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/05/31/a-guide-to-whats-going-on-in-istanbuls-gezi-park/

For live streaming of the attacks (click on the blue video icon on the top right corner): http://www.dha.com.tr/

For continually updated photos of the attacks: http://occupygezipics.tumblr.com/

My heart goes out to the defenders of the commons in Turkey tonight. ❤

Tags: #ayagakalk, #geziparki, #occupygezi, #occupytaksim, turkey

Comment

and I wanted to hold you as you made your escape

Filed under: Art & Literature, Love, Nerdgasm — Leave a comment

May 30, 2013

I always wanted to be a librarian, and now that I think of it, I kind of am. I have my library of zines and a plethora of letters and mail art from the era that I would most want to curate. Now I just need to find a way to share them.

I can share some here. I’ve spent my spare time today sorting through letters that I have in a box – mostly from around 1990-1994.

I’m pretty sure I have a box of letters that span the mid-late-80’s. At least I HOPE I do. I HOPE it didn’t get thrown away.

I will forever remember the box of mail and zines I left behind because it wouldn’t fit into my car when I moved out of the house on 49th street in a big hurry. I will always wonder what little pieces of my past remained behind in that box.

I’ve culled through letters several times, though. Tossing those that were inconsequential. Keeping those from people I really cared about. Looking back at them, I see so much I didn’t see then.

What remains is loveliness from all corners of the earth. From dear friends in IL, GA, MI, CA, CO…not to mention Finland, Denmark, England.

The perpetually-incarcerated artist/bankrobber.

The octogenarian poet from New York.

The crazy beatnik from Albuquerque who sent risque photo postcards. The shy young woman who sent artwork and poetry to me, tentatively.

The boy with a crush on me that I completely ignored due to my tendency to remain oblivious to such things. The junkie cartoonist from New York.

All, all, all committing paper to pen several times a month. So many letters that began with “I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to get back to you.” and “It was great to finally hear from you!”

I had their addresses memorized. Or, at least, their zip codes. I still think about them when I hear people say they are from some obscure town that someone I once knew hailed from. Midland, Michigan. Appleton, Wisconsin. Yellow River, Ohio. Fair Oaks, California. I would grow to love the way they shaped their letters and the pattern of punctuation the way most would love a face or a particular accent.

When I was in high school, I would frequently make my mother call me in sick so I could spend the day in my pajamas, answering mail. Writing letters. Waiting waiting waiting for the thick bundle of mail to drop between the screen door and the wooden door because there was too much to fit in the mailbox.

And there was mail art. Interesting envelopes. Who knows what mail I never received because of the container that held it.

Yesterday, I was thinking that my friend P is the kind of adult I always thought was cool when I was younger. Unassuming, and cool as shit. Today, glancing through this bit of my history, I realize – I am exactly the kind of adult that I wanted to be. And THAT is pretty damn cool.

Tags: art, letters, pen pals, poetry, punk rock, zines

Comment

In a world where everybody fucks everyone else over…

Filed under: Love, Nerdgasm — Leave a comment

May 29, 2013

Today is all about the sniffles. It’s been smelling like rain all day, but refusing to rain…and my sinuses have been doing their job, fortifying against the evil mold spores! I shall fire upon them with my plentiful mucus!

As I write this, I am hiding from my children. Holed up at my friend P’s house, watching cable television and doing laundry while she’s out of town. This happens way more frequently than I deserve, but not nearly as frequently as I desire. It’s nice to escape my houseful of boys on occasion.

But it’s also nice to be at P’s house, because it’s very P. I’m hoping she doesn’t mind that I just took a bunch of photos of what that means so I can share them with you. hahaha. (I texted to get her permission and she said “No worries.”)

This, is P…

And This is P…